Long-time readers know that “research” claiming everyone is surfing the Web on their smartphone while shopping in a store agitates the hell out of us. Especially since we haven’t seen anyone – anyone – doing it in all the stores we've ever been in .
A new study “confirming” this apparent trend seems to come out every week, all of them candidates for our Research Hall Of Sham. But today’s nominee has raised (or lowered, depending on your point of view) the bar for admission.
A customer-experience company with the awful/silly (pick one or both) name “Empathica” has released a gem of a research report. Among its conclusions are the now-typical claims that:
- “34% of smartphone owners have scanned a QR code”
- “55% of smartphone owners say they use their mobile devices to check prices while they are shopping” (notice the “say they use” terminology)
The latter would translate to nearly 100 MILLION U.S. citizens – why we haven’t spotted a single one yet is perplexing.
But that’s not why Empathica is headed to the Sham Hall. Here’s the reason:
“In fact, 9% [of in-store shoppers] even take the time out to write a review before they leave the store.”
We will repeat that.
“In fact, 9% [of in-store shoppers] even take the time out to write a review before they leave the store.”
Like this? “Wow” …tap tap tap… “these shoes” …tap tap tap… “fit side by side in a box.”
Or this? “Wow” …tap tap tap… “these pants” …tap tap tap… “fold nicely in a shopping bag.”
Or this? “Wow” …tap smoosh tap… “this ice cream cone” …tap smoosh tap… “melts fast.”
This is nonsense that also violates the laws of physics. The distance from checkout to “leave the store” would not even allow a person enough time to Tweet. Never mind actually using the purchased product.
Empathica knows this is bullsh*t. Here is what a company rep told MediaPost in an interview:
“This is really a new cultural phenomenon. This is a highly value-conscious consumer, who wants to brag about how little they [sic] had to spend to get that brand name.”
- Wrong #1 – “value-conscious” consumers don’t own smartphones
- Wrong #2 – a 100% focus on price paid isn’t a “review”
Sorry, Empathica, but we can’t empathize with the 9%.
