As we did in September of 2011, we put out a call to any and all search engine optimization so-called “gurus.” Knowing full well, as was the case back then, none will be “found” to take our challenge.
Roughly four weeks ago, the great Google began stiffing Lairig Marketing in its search results. On main search, we now get one token, generic listing. On blog search, we are indexed with a post from TWENTY-TWO days ago.
A problem like this should be akin to shooting fish in a barrel for any search expert. Think about it. He (or she) is focused on the thinnest slice of marketing ever created. He just needs to remember a handful of fundamentals, none of which have changed since roughly, um, 1995 – use meta tags, write good content, get lots of legal backlinks, blah blah blah.
The rest of the “guru” qualification requires kneeling at the throne of Google Search God, Matt Cutts, as he teases them with dribbles of algorithmic information.
While they wait for the next Cutts Commandment, SEO gurus read and comment on the same three topics recycled daily on trade pubs Search Engine Watch and Search Engine Land (sample article from today’s S.E.W.: “Dramatically Raise the Value of Any Piece of Content with These 27 Tactics”).
SEO gurus are too busy to respond to us, anyway. If they are not at the biggest boondoggle of 2013 – SXSW (which, by the way, features a big announcement from none other than…*drumroll*…MATT CUTTS !!!) – they are getting ready for the second-biggest boondoggle of 2013: MediaPost’s Search Insider Summit.
Three full days, jam packed with, um, a scant 9 hours of conference discussion, almost all of which are some variation of Big Data. Any manager who approves this sort of travel should be fired.
Meanwhile, we are left wondering “where is the optimization in SEO?” Best we can tell, SEO “gurus” can only get you started, assuming you are a complete tard with zero knowledge of search. Once you are up and running, they have no idea what to tell you.
Case in point: We have posted our specific problem on Google’s “expert” forums (among several others). We have received but a single response: a “guru” who sent us a link to a pdf of “SEO 101.” Useless, and typical, but thanks.
Our current search issue is the SEO guru’s worst nightmare, the stone wall, the final lap of a race running with a refrigerator on his back: a CHANGE in search engine ranking. Remember, gurus only know the start-up basics. They have absolutely no idea what causes a change in search results. No. Idea.
To prove our thesis, we state two hypotheses/questions for SEO gurus as simply as this, and await with bated breath the (non)response:
>>>Is there another Google Panda underway (or recently concluded) that would temporarily mess up what had been instantaneous indexing of our blog posts?
>>>Was our end-of January use of (what we learned later to be) the fraudulent sponsored content of VIRURL, which we documented here, penalized by Google as “illegal” clicks/links? And if so, now that we stopped our use of VIRURL, how long until Google takes us back? Or do we need to beg forgiveness? Whose specific as& do we need to lick at Google to get back in?
(P.S. Do a Google search for anything related to this situation – “Google bans sponsored links,” “VIRURL scam,” etc. – and see that not a single SEO guru has any idea wtf we are talking about.)
If search gurus were as good as advertised, they’d find this post. They’d answer our questions.
And they’d know how to contact us.